Someday you'll need to stand tall again (emella) wrote,
Someday you'll need to stand tall again

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SPN Fic: Sinners and Saints (5/?) (S/D)

Title: Sinners and Saints
Author: emella
Rating: R
Pairing: Sam/Dean
Warnings: Undeathfic. And ya know, the whole gay incest thing.
Disclaimer: I don't own 'em.
Spoilers: Dead Man's Blood. Eventual General AHBL/Season 3.
Summary: Vampires mate for life. "They’re natural predators..."

Previous Parts here.

Sam knows that Dean hates it, hates himself for turning Sam. Dean sold his soul to save his brother’s life and instead he’s taken it. Sam doesn’t care; it will all work out in the end. They haven’t really talked about the crossroads deal yet. They’re not sure what will happen, and now that they’ve changed, they live in the moment. They’re at the top of the food chain, considered extinct, they’re not sure what the rules of the game are anymore, let alone whether or not they’re still playing. All the lore says that they lack souls, neither of them are too sure if that’s true or not, but they aren’t too worried. No, for now they just exist, they don’t worry about the future. No ticking clock as far as they know, so no sense in rushing when they can stop and smell the roses.

They’re in an all night diner, two days after Sam wakes up. It’s three in the morning and Dean’s drinking cold coffee while Sam watches the world outside the window. They don’t speak to fill the silences anymore. They’ve got some sort of bond now. Not anything supernatural sixth-sense-like, but a primal sort of knowledge. They’re natural predators, like wolves or hawks, they aren’t really defined by human terms. They can’t really define who they are or what they do, they’re more like creatures, animals than humans. They still think in human thoughts, act like they did before, but they’re more instinctual than ever and their senses determine things more often than logic.

They know that the technical term for what they are is a pair bond, at least that’s the lame-o term Sam came up with after searching the internet for an hour. They’re a mated pair. They don’t know much about their vampirical heritage, they know the basics, mate, blood, sun. They figure they’ll run into some others eventually, and hopefully they’ll get clued in.

That’s another thing they haven’t discussed, covens and nests. Vampires are pack animals and even though as Winchesters they’re naturally solitary, they both feel that need to just belong. Sam knows that Dean feels it stronger due to the fact that he lost his sire, but they have each other so the lack of pack doesn’t hurt as much.

In respect to hurt, their emotions aren’t as prevalent anymore, they’re still emotional, but they have needs and wants more so than feelings. They’re morals aren’t as strict now either. Creatures that aren’t defined by biblical terms or human laws can’t be held accountable for human morals. Even though they don’t really care who they eat, being raised the way they were, growing up with the urge to protect humanity at all costs, they stick to killing criminals and rapists. They’ve only taken two people so far, and both times they were criminals. Some part of Sam, a logical side, steeped-in-ethics side, still wonders whether or not it’s ethical to kill humans, but his instincts are too strong to be silenced.

In the long run Sam thinks that eventually they’ll give up hunting, for now though, they’ve got too much mess to clean up, too many things that are unfinished. The devil’s gate was opened because of them and they need to fix that error, make sure those cases are closed. They were also practically born into this hunting lifestyle, and despite all the changes, they can’t change everything. No, they’ll keep hunting for a while, maybe not forever, but right now the Impala is still home and the next hunt is still their goal.

They’re a new breed of creature, not strictly Sam and Dean anymore. They’re so much more now. They’re hunters and predators, creatures external to the world in which most are accustomed. They feed off of sentient beings, there is no other animal in the world like them and they’re trying to find a medium between who they are and what they are. Sam just hopes they find that medium soon. They still have enemies out there, Gordon, demons, hunters would kill them just for being what they are, no thought to anything else.

So here they sit, at a diner at three in the morning. They’re different and the same all at once. Things will be different now, two creatures that won’t age or die naturally, but they’re still changing and Sam can only hope that change is in some way for the better. He supposes he’ll just have to wait and see.

Part 6
Tags: fic, sinners & saints, slash fic, supernatural

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