Someday you'll need to stand tall again (emella) wrote,
Someday you'll need to stand tall again

Some College/life Stuff

So the other day I was in one of the computer labs at school and this girl was talking about how they were reviewing her portfolio. She was talking to this upper quarter guy and then they started talking about where they wanted to go after graduation, what cities. The girl mentioned North or South Carolina and the guy said something about Phoenix and it got me thinking. After I get my degree I could be done.


As in Done DONE.

I could graduate and work the rest of my life as a graphic designer. I could start my life. It just is kind of a weird eye opening experience. I mean I have been assuming that I would be going for my Master's but now there's this little part of me that keeps telling me that I could just stop and go to work.

I've wanted to go and be an illustrator for the last year just about and it's odd because the part of me that keeps saying, oh you can just stop is like sidetracking the part of me that has decided what it wants.

College is such a tricky thing. Just when I know what I want to do, another possibility pops up and I start re-thinking things. It's weird.

Above and beyond the Master's degree thing, there's the whole ''' thing. I mean... I could be an adult... When I graduate in a couple years I could move away and just start growing up... part of that is terrifying in it's independence and part of it is exhilarating. The thought that I would be out, on my own, a grown up, working never occurred to me in such REAL terms before.

So Mom and I were talking about this and I was just like bwuh? Then she started comparing coming to college like living on your own and I just can't compare the two. I mean the differences are huge.

This is part of our conversation (which I found strangely profound):

Em: Going to college is like learning to ride a bike, Graduating and moving on are like learning to drive a car. They're two completely different things.
Mom: Yeah, they are. They both give you freedom. A bike lets you ride around the neighborhood, a car lets you ride around the city.
Em: Or the world...

I mean there really is that possibility that I could conquer the world. The possibilities are just out there waiting and the thought of that is terrifying and exciting all at the same time.

I never thought that my life would turn out the way it has and every day I just learn more and more how different life can be. You really can do anything and be anything. Life really is out there waiting and you just have to reach out and grab it.
Tags: college, general, me

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